There is only one thing that you know for sure while going through your IVF cycle and that is you cannot control ANYTHING. Not your baseline u/s antral follie count, not your E2 levels, not how many follies you will have, not how many eggs they will be able to retrieve, now how many eggs will fertilize, not how many embryos will mature, not how many embryos will survive and definitely not how many will implant.
It isn’t like I need to be in control of every situation. However the overwhelming feeling of having absolutely no control over anything leaves you demanding to be included in the decisions of your own fate. No matter how many times you tell everyone (including yourself) that you are leaving it in God’s hands, that what ever that happens is ‘meant’ to happen… deep down you long for feeling like you had a hand-in helping things go your way.
Maybe it is just my Type A personality but I never expected to get this type of satisfaction from my daily injections. Organizing my meds, preparing and administering the daily injection lets me feel as if I am in control. Maybe it is because I have wanted and waited so long to have an IVF Cycle that I feel as if I need to embrace and savor each moment. If I have faith that God has for some reason or another decided this is the road we must go down to become parents and has given the knowledge so that doctors can help us conceive... Then my only job is to prepare my body for pregnancy and that includes my daily injections. I am thankful that he has given me this task so that my idle hands will not Google and I will feel ‘involved’ in the process.
CD 33 / CD4
Day 10 of Lupron (10units, subQ injection)
Expect the unexpected… this morning I prepared both my Lupron injection and the Menopur+Bravelle injection. I had them both ready to go sitting on the table as I mapped out the best possible location for today’s injections. Alcohol swabbed and ready to go I pinched my skin and looked at the needle IT WAS BENT! I am not sure how but it was… So I injected the Lupron back into the vial and grabbed a new syringe. I am so happy I have a few extra syringes
Day 3 of Menopur (75iu, subQ injection) + Bravelle (150iu, subQ injection)
Besides a little burning, and swelling around the injection site I did not have any real side effects today.
It isn’t like I need to be in control of every situation. However the overwhelming feeling of having absolutely no control over anything leaves you demanding to be included in the decisions of your own fate. No matter how many times you tell everyone (including yourself) that you are leaving it in God’s hands, that what ever that happens is ‘meant’ to happen… deep down you long for feeling like you had a hand-in helping things go your way.
Maybe it is just my Type A personality but I never expected to get this type of satisfaction from my daily injections. Organizing my meds, preparing and administering the daily injection lets me feel as if I am in control. Maybe it is because I have wanted and waited so long to have an IVF Cycle that I feel as if I need to embrace and savor each moment. If I have faith that God has for some reason or another decided this is the road we must go down to become parents and has given the knowledge so that doctors can help us conceive... Then my only job is to prepare my body for pregnancy and that includes my daily injections. I am thankful that he has given me this task so that my idle hands will not Google and I will feel ‘involved’ in the process.
CD 33 / CD4
Day 10 of Lupron (10units, subQ injection)
Expect the unexpected… this morning I prepared both my Lupron injection and the Menopur+Bravelle injection. I had them both ready to go sitting on the table as I mapped out the best possible location for today’s injections. Alcohol swabbed and ready to go I pinched my skin and looked at the needle IT WAS BENT! I am not sure how but it was… So I injected the Lupron back into the vial and grabbed a new syringe. I am so happy I have a few extra syringes
Day 3 of Menopur (75iu, subQ injection) + Bravelle (150iu, subQ injection)
Besides a little burning, and swelling around the injection site I did not have any real side effects today.
CD 34 / CD5
Day 11 of Lupron (10units, subQ injection)
Ouch! My first choice of an injection site this morning wasn’t agreeable. I tried sticking myself with the needle only to find that it wouldn’t go in… the second spot was much better and it went in just fine. I guess I just have more muscle at this particular spot of my thigh. I have a little welt from where I first tried to stick myself, but the second spot and actual injection location feels fine. Just shows that you never totally are a pro no matter how many injections you have given yourself.
Day 4 of Menopur (75iu, subQ injection) + Bravelle (150iu, subQ injection)
Today’s injection didn’t burn as much as it has previously.
There is only one way to happiness and that is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the power of our will. ~ Epictetus
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