A Goldilocks Frame of Mind

Today was my first follie check/scan. The tech is quick and I am not even sure she found and measured them all. Maybe I am just used to my RE in Orlando who takes his time and shows me the follies as we go through. I kind of feel like a spy as I stretch to see what she writes on the file. 8 on one side and 9 on the other… and some more smaller ones that she did not count nor measure. The IVF Coordinator said that she expects for the RE to harvest 15 eggs with all of the same quality and size, which is exactly what they want. She explained that they do not want too many or too little and that 15 is “JUST RIGHT” I feel like Goldilocks. Our next Follie Check will be on Tuesday. This is just another lesson on “how to relinquish control and trust in the doctors”. As my research and heart tells me that follies grow 1-3mm each day… and the perfect size for the trigger shot is between 15-20mm, so triggering in 7 days seems like it is too late. However my brain and common sense is that I am not a doctor. Thus I am going to try and not outsmart my common sense. Anytime I feel unsure about the doctors decision I will repeat to myself not too early, not too late, not too many, not too little “JUST RIGHT”.

CD 35 / CD6
Day 12 of Lupron (10units, subQ injection)
“JUST RIGHT”
Day 5 of Menopur (75iu, subQ injection) + Bravelle (150iu, subQ injection)
My needle broke off and stabbed me in the thumb. Here I am trying to look like a pro in front of the IVF Coordinator and she had to get a band aid since it refused to stop bleeding. She also brought me extra needles to last until my next appt. which is three shots away (Tuesday). Unscrewed the needle and put a new one on and we were good to go. Tom gave me my injection since I was too busy nursing my thumb. This is the first injection he has given me this cycle. He is a pro – the injection was quick and painless.

If you want to reach a state of bliss, then go beyond your ego and the internal dialogue. Make a decision to relinquish the need to control, the need to be approved, and the need to judge. Those are the three things the ego is doing all the time. It's very important to be aware of them every time they come up. ~ Deepak Chopra